A Baby for Hannah (Hannah's Heart 3) Read online

  “There have been broken hearts before,” Hannah said, pulling the letter out of the envelope.

  “Not like mine, and not in the shadows of these beautiful mountains. Do you think Da Hah would be so cruel, Hannah, to allow me to see such wonder and beauty, and then take it all away again? I look into Dennis’s eyes, Hannah, and I want to die if I can’t be his wife someday. I just couldn’t even stay here in Montana if…” Miriam wiped away a tear.

  “Come now,” Hannah said, holding the letter tightly in her fingers as she gave Miriam a quick hug with her other hand. “We must not borrow trouble from tomorrow, and trouble that might never come anyway. Da Hah will always give grace to bear whatever trials He gives us.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel any better,” Miriam said, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand. “But I know it’s true, so I will be brave.”

  “You don’t have to pretend,” Hannah said. “Da Hah understands when we cry.”

  “I’ll never get over Dennis, if I lose him. I’ll just be an old maid forever. After him, there could never be another man for me.”

  “Let’s see what Mom has to say,” Hannah said, opening the single page.

  Dear Miriam,

  I hope this still finds you well and enjoying your job. I know Hannah loved it a lot when she worked for Betty those two summers. I was sure you would have the same reaction, but it’s still good to hear the report.

  We are all as well as can be expected with the winter flu bug thankfully a thing of the past. At least one would hope so, as I haven’t heard much for sometime now. Spring took a hold around here early, and summer is already with us. We had our first really warm day, and the garden plants are growing like weeds. Not that the weeds aren’t also growing, but we can pull those.

  I had all the children out last night, including Isaac, who did little but grumble, but the boy can pull weeds faster than anyone I know. Roy even helped after supper, and we got through the entire garden, which was a big relief off my mind.

  I also received a letter from Hannah, but haven’t had time to answer it. I thought yours was more important, especially after receiving the letter from Betty. Who is this Dennis boy you’re dating, Miriam? Is he a heathen? Of course I’m teasing, but Betty does sound quite worried. She also said that Hannah shares her fears.

  If this is true, Miriam, then you should really proceed with much caution. I know you’ve never lost your heart to a man before, and that you are a little older than some. Perhaps this is why you have fallen extra hard—or maybe it’s for the reason you think.

  I know that Betty gets excited about things. Sometimes more than what she should. I haven’t forgotten how she got things muddled up with Jake and Hannah, but I didn’t do too well on that situation myself. So perhaps this time we can keep our heads on and find a better path without the embarrassment Hannah went through. I certainly don’t want another daughter walking out on her wedding day. And not just walking out, but walking out just before she said her vows. I thought I would melt right into the floor from embarrassment, and Roy was ready to use the switch on one little girl if she hadn’t been so big by then.

  So take things easy, is all I can say, and don’t lose your head. Ask Hannah what she thinks, as she and Jake have very level heads.

  With much love,

  Mom

  “Well?” Miriam asked as Hannah raised her head from the page. “What do you think?”

  “She still hasn’t forgotten my wedding fiasco,” Hannah said.

  “That’s not surprising. Who could forget that? You were a mess that day and had been for weeks. Yet you were too stubborn to admit your mistake until the last minute. At least you can be thankful you had enough sense then.”

  “I just couldn’t do it,” Hannah said. “I couldn’t say the words. I couldn’t even nod my head yes because I knew the bishop would have taken even that.”

  “Just be thankful you didn’t marry Sam. That’s all I can say. Even though it was embarrassing for all of us. I remember thinking I’d never get a boy after that. Not if they knew I was the sister of a girl who walked out on her wedding.”

  “I’m sorry I was so stupid. And I’ll never stop being sorry—as if that will do much good.”

  “Sam was a nice boy, really. And you would have made a perfect farmer’s wife.”

  “Perhaps better than a preacher’s wife.”

  “Come now, you’re a jewel of a preacher’s wife. I was just teasing.”

  “I know,” Hannah said. “Well, the time is passing. I expect I’d better get going to the doctor’s office.”

  “Has something happened yet?”

  “No, not as far as I know.”

  “I’m praying for you,” Miriam said, touching Hannah’s shoulder. “I think this is going to be a very special summer for all of us.”

  “Thank you,” Hannah whispered. “I hope you’re right.”

  “Hannah!” Betty shouted from the house, throwing open the front door, and hurrying across the lawn. “How long have you been out here, and why haven’t you told me? There’s so much going on all the time, I don’t pay attention to people coming and going anymore.”

  “Good morning!” Hannah answered. “Miriam and I were just catching up on the news.”

  “I hope you weren’t giving her any comfort with that Dennis fellow. If I had anything to say about it, I’d chase him right back to Idaho where he came from.”

  “Don’t you think that’s a little hard on him?” Hannah said. “Everyone deserves a chance.”

  “I say the fellow is up to no good, stealing your sister’s heart like that, and all the time having plans to smash her heart to pieces when the summer is over.”

  “Maybe he loves her as much as Miriam loves him?” Hannah suggested.

  Betty snorted. “Why don’t you go tell Rebecca that. She could give you an earful on what it’s like living with a man who plans to leave the faith.”

  “I’ve never heard Rebecca complain,” Hannah said. “And Miriam also understands the danger, I’m sure. Don’t you, Miriam?”

  Miriam grunted something under her breath.

  “I hope she does,” Betty said. “And I hope your Jake understands how serious a thing he has undertaken. Standing up to the bishop like that. Not many young preachers would dare do such a thing.”

  “How did you find out?” Hannah asked.

  “You know how such things get around. You can’t keep it a secret. So is Jake planning to change his mind?”

  “I will leave that up to Jake,” Hannah said. “But we really shouldn’t be discussing church things. It won’t improve the situation in the least.”

  “It sure doesn’t do much good leaving it up to the men,” Betty said. “They can make a mighty big mess of things, is all I can say.”

  Twenty-Three

  Hannah turned onto the blacktop road, leaning out of the buggy to wave at Betty and Miriam as they stood by the barn. How wonderful it was to have Miriam here, even if it meant Betty was riled up over Dennis. Betty was usually upset over something or other anyway. Besides, Betty would eventually get over it—unless Dennis really was of the same mind as his brother Will, and planned to leave the Amish.

  If that happened, it would break Miriam’s heart. What would her sister do? Return to Indiana in bitterness, the memory of her summer in Montana forever tainted by regret and disappointment?

  “Please, Lord,” Hannah whispered, “don’t let Miriam’s heart be broken. And save us from this threat of the Mennonites. Help Jake do the right thing. If he’s wrong, help him be brave enough to change his mind before it’s too late.”

  If Jake changed his mind, that would mean Ben and Sylvia would be immediately placed in the ban. That would certainly simplify things. Anyone who would think of attending the meetings would know they were under the threat of similar actions. And no Amish person would visit a revival meeting under such a cloud…right?

  Hannah urged Mosey on again. Betty didn’t have a clock in the
barn, but Hannah knew she must have used up most of her spare time by now. Dr. Lisa had always been on time last year, and she probably wouldn’t look kindly on patients arriving late. The bobli was the most important thing at the moment, and thoughts of church matters must be pushed aside. Jake could handle them anyway.

  Approaching the outskirts of Libby, Hannah pulled back so hard on the reins that Mosey slid to a complete halt. Behind her an Englisha vehicle screeched its tires and then passed her, blasting his horn, the driver obviously upset. Hannah’s eyes were on the open field, where men scurried around driving stakes into the ground and laying out a large piece of canvas. Over two large poles at the entrance was a huge banner that read Old-Fashioned Tent Revival, and in smaller letters beneath, Welcome, one and all.

  Pulling in her breath, Hannah slapped the reins. Mosey jumped so hard the buggy jerked forward. The Mennonite tent revival was really coming, and Da Hah had chosen not to intervene. Did He have any idea of the damage that might be done to their lives? Surely He did, and still He deemed to allow it. The will of Da Hah must be submitted to, and He would give the grace necessary for the temptation. Jake would notice the tent on his way home. He would need to be comforted tonight, but then perhaps he would comfort her. He was that kind of man.

  Pulling into the parking lot at Dr. Lisa’s office, Hannah got out and tied Mosey to the hitching post. It was nice of Dr. Lisa to supply a hitching post for her Amish clientele. She appreciated their needs, contrary to the Mennonites, who sought to profit from the Amish. Let the Mennonites raise their own young people, instead of stealing them ready-made from hard-working, praying Amish parents, who wanted only the right thing for their families.

  Hannah pushed the bitter thoughts away as she walked quickly toward Dr. Lisa’s waiting room door and entered.

  “Good morning,” the receptionist, a jolly looking middle-aged woman, said. “Are you here for an appointment?”

  “Yes, Hannah Byler to see Dr. Lisa,” Hannah said, signing her name on the paper.

  It felt gut to say Byler after her name. There wasn’t much opportunity among the Amish. And the name felt like Jake, like his strong arms around her when he comforted her, like the smell of his beard when she nestled on his shoulder. She carried his bobli now, who would also be a Byler. They would call the child something wonderful and strong like Jake, only it wouldn’t be Jake Junior. It would be something equally gut, and they would know the right name when the time came.

  “The nurse will take you in now,” the receptionist said with another smile, motioning toward a white-clad young lady.

  “I’m Sally,” the nurse said. “If you’ll come with me, we’ll get your lab work done, and Dr. Lisa will see you after that.”

  Hannah followed the young woman, feeling the pound of her heart and the flood of memories. This was where she had come the last time. This was where the awful news had been delivered.

  As they entered the exam room, Sally asked, “Is there something wrong? You seem nervous.”

  “No, not really,” Hannah said. “Just memories I guess. I lost my previous baby…”

  “Oh, of course. I saw on your chart that you miscarried last year. I’m so sorry. I’m sure you’ll do fine this time.”

  “I hope so,” Hannah said, forcing a smile as she sat down. “I have been praying really hard.”

  “Then you should be okay,” Sally said, fastening the blood pressure strap on Hannah’s arm.

  Hannah felt the pressure of the strap tighten on her arm and caught sight of the bouncing needle on the gauge. Would this be the first of bad news again? Would alarm soon show on the nurse’s face? Would Dr. Lisa come in later, her face long and sober?

  “One twenty over eighty,” Sally said cheerfully. “Looks like we’re off to a good start.”

  “That’s gut to hear.”

  “Have you had any extra stress lately?”

  “Jah,” Hannah said. Though what it was had best be kept quiet.

  “You should try to keep the stress levels down, which means the readings could even be better than what they are. So let’s take your blood, and Dr. Lisa will be right in.”

  Hannah flinched at the sting of the needle, watching the little canister fill with the bright-red fluid from her vein. Somewhere within her, the unborn child was receiving that same blood and building his own at the same time. How wonderful were the ways of Da Hah. Jake had read the Scripture one Sunday where King David wrote about being fearfully and wonderfully made.

  “There!” Sally said, dabbing the needle prick with cotton and slipping on a small bandage. “Fold your arm for a minute, and everything will be fine.”

  Hannah kept her arm bent, as Sally left the room with her vial of blood. Minutes passed before the door opened again to show the cheerful face of Dr. Lisa.

  “Well, well,” Dr. Lisa said. “If it’s not Hannah Byler back again. I’m really glad to see you. Some couples who miscarry aren’t quite up to trying again so soon.”

  “Both Jake and I want a baby very much,” Hannah said.

  “That’s the spirit,” Dr. Lisa said, preparing to start her examination. “Have you decided yet whether you will be using a midwife? I know you Amish like to use the midwives, but I do have a nice birthing clinic that’s operational now. You might want to consider it.”

  “I’ll ask Jake, but I don’t think he’ll care either way.”

  “Then it’s up to you,” Dr. Lisa said, “which is how it should be. Are all your Amish men so agreeable?”

  “Mostly,” Hannah said, smiling. “But Jake is special, of course.”

  “I’m sure he is,” Dr. Lisa said. “So will it be a boy or a girl? I can put you on the ultrasound and find out.”

  “No,” Hannah said quickly. “I don’t want to know.”

  “Really?”

  “Jah, I want the birth to be a surprise like it used to be for my mom.”

  “Okay, whatever you want, but if there are complications, I’ll need to look. I guess I don’t have to tell you though.”

  “That’s fine. Are there complications?” Hannah asked, her eyes searching Dr. Lisa’s face.

  “None that I can find. I’ll take a look at the blood test and be back in a minute. You can go ahead and get dressed.”

  Hannah stared at the closed door. It was so gut to feel the peace flooding her heart. That must be the grace of God because Dr. Lisa had said there could be complications even though there were none obvious at the moment. She took a deep breath. Her bobli would be okay. He was in the hands of Da Hah. What to do about the midwife could be decided later. Dr. Lisa would show her the birthing room when it was time. Hannah sat upright on the examining table. It would take time to notify the midwife, if that was what Jake and she decided. And the midwife might have a very busy schedule. She stepped down from the table and quickly got dressed.

  The door opened again, admitting a calm-faced Dr. Lisa.

  “Everything’s fine, Hannah,” Dr. Lisa said. “And I see no reason why it shouldn’t stay so.”

  “What about a due date?” Hannah asked. “I was thinking the end of November or so.”

  “I think you’re about right,” Dr. Lisa said. “But I don’t need to tell you that babies have minds of their own. We understand that and will work accordingly.”

  “Then I’d better have you show me the birthing room,” Hannah said. “I think I need to make up my mind about the midwife.”

  “Sure,” Dr. Lisa said. “The nurse can take you to the back of the clinic. I hope you like what you see. We try to take good care of our patients and the babies they bring into the world.”

  “I’m sure you do,” Hannah said, standing and following Dr. Lisa into the hallway.

  “Wait a minute here,” Dr. Lisa said, disappearing around the corner. She was back quickly with Sally in tow.

  “Here I am again,” Sally said. “Dr. Lisa tells me you want to see the birthing room.”

  “If it’s not too much bother.”

  “
Not in the least. Come, I’ll show you.”

  “You take care now,” Dr. Lisa said, patting Hannah on the shoulder.

  “Thank you,” Hannah said before following Sally down the long hallway. Toward the back, Sally held open a door, motioning for Hannah to go first. Stepping into a spacious open room, Hannah paused to look around.

  “It’s quite homey,” Sally said, standing beside her. “Dr. Lisa wanted an outdoor atmosphere, so she went all out with the shrubs and small trees. I told her she’d soon have a forest growing in here. All we lack is a little river.”

  “And wild animals,” Hannah said with a laugh. “No bears?”

  “Bears. Now that’s funny. No, there certainly aren’t any bears in here—unless you count the husbands. They can get a little bearish at times, but we have a room for them if they get out of hand.”

  “Oh,” Hannah laughed. “Do you really?”

  “No, actually I was teasing. We want the husbands to stay with their wives and supply all the support they can. There is a Lamaze class most of the couples take, and they arrive well-prepared, believe me.”

  “What’s a Lamaze class?”

  “It’s where an instructor walks the couples through the pregnancy and birthing time, teaching breathing and relaxation methods they can use when their time comes.”

  “I can’t imagine Jake doing that.”

  “Oh, most husbands get used to the idea, although it’s not for everyone, I suppose. And over there are the post delivery rooms, two of them at present on either side of the birthing room. We want you to feel comfortable during and after the birth.”

  “I see,” Hannah said, glancing into the rooms. Plants were placed in each corner of the room, with smaller ones in front.

  “It’s nice, isn’t it?” Sally said moments later, leading the way back to the front of the building.